Captain Churro's election site
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Quick Candidate Profile:
What is your full name?
Captain Churro!
Which Mario game did you appear in?
Super Mario Bros. 2. I guess!
What is your favorite color?
Puppies!
What is your favorite food group?
Puppies!
Who is your Campaign Manager?
Lord Reid!
What is your Political Party?
Neglectocrats!
Why did you join that party?
I like parties!
Why did you decide to run for president?
Walking isn't fast enough.
What are your plans if you're elected?
Lower taxes, Raise roofs.
What is your policy on Speedos?
I don't condone drugs.
What is your policy on Mario?
Dan Mario is an excellent football player, and should be allowed to play.
What is your policy on gangs in schools?
-Target students vulnerable to gang recruitment for special assistance, particularly through the use of peer counselors and support groups. Mentoring, conflict resolution programs, and tutoring can be particularly effective.
-Establish moral and ethical education, values clarification, and conflict resolution as important components of the school curriculum.
-Create an inviting school climate where every student feels valued.
-Educate all school staff, including support staff, about how gangs develop and how to respond to them.
-Offer special programs for parents on gangs and how to deal with them as a parent. Present information in a culturally sensitive way, and in a variety of languages, to reflect the diversity of the community.
-Monitor youths who are not enrolled in school but "hang out" on or near school property. This can help school officials assess the existence of gangs in the neighborhood, and anticipate and prevent their formation in the school.
-Offer educational programs for students about gangs, their destructiveness, and how to avoid being drawn into them, preferably in small groups where they can express their feelings comfortably.
-Provide regular opportunities for students individually and/or in small groups to discuss their experiences in school and make future plans that offer hope and personal rewards.
What is your policy on allowing Squaresoft characters to come to NC?
Only allow them on the waning gibbous stage of the moon.
What is your policy on the environment?
The environment is ok in my book.
Paper or plastic?
Both taste fine.
Do you have any other comments or statements that you would like to make to the voters?
Up with woodwinds, down with lower strings!