Bowser's speeches site
(9/15/04)
Koopa: So, Bowser, you say you want to run for president, but WHY do you want to be president of NC?
Bowser: Well, after countless times of trying to defeat Mario and failing (mostly because of the Gamer's awesome skills, and NOT because of Mario himself), I figured it would be a good step forward to organize the group that's always been against Mario. NC Has always stood it's ground of anti-Marioism, and I will keep that ground if my life depends on it.
Koopa: Really?
Bowser: Sure. I've got about 99 extra lives.
Koopa: Cool. Now that that's settled, what do you plan to do once you make it into office.
Bowser: NC is in dire need of updates. If Jay doesn't do something within the week, I'll rush over to his house and burninate one of his most priceless posessions. That'll motivate his updates!
Koopa: Ruthless, but efficient! And considering how Jay is, he won't be keeping many of his prized posessions for long!
Bowser: Exactly. He has little choice if he wants to keep his SNES alive.
Koopa: I see...now what do you plan on doing about the massive tax inflation? How will our tax rates change?
Bowser: You mean the tax rate of zero percent?
Koopa: Yes.
Bowser: I'll cut it in half.
Koopa: YES! High Score! Okay, so one more question, then we'll be accepting questions from the audience. How do you know Trogdor?
Bowser: We went to Burniniation classes together.
Koopa: Wow! Cool! Okay, now for the audience. Questions, anyone?
(//04) :
A new political announcement for Bowser for 2004!
Voiceover: Many of the candidates you know have been tied to scandals, including the support and/or restrictions placed upon Speedo wearing, plots for world destruction, reportedly trying to conquer NC Land for their own sick and twisted benefits, severe psychological problems, extreme environmental acts, split-personalities, and lastly, but not leastly, the fear, allowance, and support of Marios in our own land! Do you want any of these candidates to be your new president? I think not.
Bowser: Hello. I'm Bowser Koopa. You all know me as Mario's #1 enemy. My goals are clear-cut. To keep Mario out and to push forward more updates! I don't support any extreme actions such as dictatorship, excessive planting of deadly piranha plants (though I do enjoy clean, fresh air). I've always been very orderly about keeping all the lands I watch over clean and orderly, and in tip top condition both physically and mentally. You can trust me to lead this website to greatness. Vote for me, for honesty.
Bowser for 2004. Bowser, a name you can trust.
Koopa: What about Speedos?
Bowser: I don't hold anything against people who MUST wear them, but for those who would rather not (ahem) "see" this display...(Holds up a pair of sunglasses) Extra-dark sunglasses for all! (Passes them out to the crowd)
Crowd: (Cheers)