Viewer Bios
By Multiple Authors
Phone the Clone By, Boshi-Gex (PokeManiac)
*** Note to Viewer: Phone the Clone is not an official mario character.
I created him and Jay gave him the name. he is NO
WAY affiliated with Nintendo in any way, shape or form. However,
he is copyrighted by me, so if I find out that you took him without
permission, I'll sue your pants off.
One spring day in the mushroom kingdom, two mushroom parents had a son.
his name was Toad. ( see Jay's Toad Bio for details ) Toad's parents had
taught him to be polite, and to use manners, blah blah blah. Toad soon
grew up to become Princess Peach's Mushroom Retainer. Toad did a perfect
job, and Peach began to think...............
" what if there were more of him? "
The next day, Peach took Toad in to get him cloned. the cloning was a
success.............
almost. instead of looking like Toad, he had green skin, pink shorts, a
gray vest, and black spots on his hat. that was not all, though. he was
evil.
of course, after seeing this, peach was ENRAGED. she wanted a clone
exactly like Toad, but she got Phone instead.
However, she soon discovered phone's evil and locked him up in the
dungeon.
5 years later, as The Mushroom Wars rages on, Luigi and Bowser
discover Phone the clone and free him along with all the other baddies
Peach had locked up. They bribed him into working for them, and he
accepted it. (read Jay & Lemmy's comic, The Mushroom Wars, for more
details. )
Well, that's all The info I've collected for now. I'll have to see what
happens in "The Mushroom Wars" before I write part 2!
Thoughts From Jay
This viewer bio, like many, has been long overdue to be put up. I am forever grateful to Pokemaniac for his Toad Clone idea.
The Yoshis By, M. J. J. Daitch
Here is a viewer bio about the no longer rare
species of dinosaurs, the Yoshis.|Status:Alive|Height:6 feet, 1
inch|Weight 210 pounds| This species of dinosaurs in Dinosaur Land, below
Brooklyn's sewers, used to be rare, but now, they are dispersed
throughout Dinosaur Land.Here are the roots to this.In 1991, a Yoshi
mother laid eggs with spots of all kinds of colors (Main Yoshi Green).She
and the Yoshi father knew that their species of dinosaurs was to become
extinct in a few years, so they left the eggs out there for somebody to
help the Yoshis one day become scattered all across Dinosaur Land, just
like the Raptors, Brontosauruses, Triceratopses, T-Rexes, etc. The Mario
Bros. had just defeated the Koopa Kids, Bowser, and their line of
unhelpful baddies (one kind is helpful, they can help to fly on SMB3).Now
they were going on to vacation in a land that sounded very interesting to
them, Dinosaur Land.There they found the huge pile of spotted dinosaur
eggs.In a short while, the eggs hatched.The first one to hatch was the
green-spotted one.Mario and Co. later found out from the Yoshi parents
that they and the dinosaur babies were from a rare species of dinosaurs
and the certain species did not have a name yet and they needed a
name.Mario was thinking about naming the species the
"Goldbergos".Goldbergo is Italian for the last name that is commonly
Jewish, Goldberg.The Mario Bros. and Wario are Jewish.Mario and Luigi's
parents are Italian Jews.There are probably many Jews (maybe almost a
million) today all over in Italy as well as Roman Catholics.Christopher
Columbus was an Italian and he was Jewish.I forgot to mention to you that
Wario was Jewish in my Wario bio.As you know, Wario's mother was Russian
and his father is Russian.Although Russia is predominantly Atheist and no
religion by about 60%, Judaism is 2nd to Atheism and no religion.Judaism
is the religion of about 26% of the Russians, while Russian Orthodoxy is
about 7%, Protestantism about 4%, Other religions (mainly Islam,
Buddhism, and Hinduism) about 2%, and Russian Catholicism with some Roman
Catholicism about 1%.Don't go by what the references, encyclopedias (both
for book and personal computer), and World Almanacs say.Ignore them and
guess on your own.Here is some trivia.Mario and Luigi's parents can speak
7 languages fluently, English, French, Portuguese, Spanish, Italian,
Hebrew, and Yiddish.Wario's mother spoke and his father still speaks 12
languages fluently, English, Welsh, Scottish, Irish, French, Portuguese,
Spanish, Italian, German, Russian, Hebrew, and Yiddish.Enough with the
trivia and the scoop on religions in Italy and Russia.Let's get back to
the story.Luigi disagreed with Mario's idea of naming this species of
dinosaurs the "Goldbergos".Mario knew that he had to think of a name that
Luigi would agree on with him.Mario then remembered the man who
originally owned his parents' land before his parents bought out the land
and built a home there.The man's first name was Yoshi (he was
Japanese).When Mario mentioned it, Luigi agreed, so it was, the green one
was named Yoshi and that certain species of dinosaurs became the
Yoshis.Yoshi was at small size then, so Mario and Luigi got 5 foods, 2
frankfurters with ketchup and mustard, 2 hamburgers with ketchup,
mustard, and raw onions, salty french fries with mustard on the side, 4
pepperoni and sausage pizzas, and a large chocolate-vanilla ice cream
swirl in a sugar ice cream cone.In time Yoshi ate it all up and grew to
grownup Yoshi size.He was going to feed the other Yoshis treats too, but
unfortunately, Bowser found evidence that Mario and Co. were on vacation
in Dinosaur Land.So Bowser went to Dinosaur Land, kidnapped Yoshi, some
other Green Yoshis, Red Yoshis, Yellow Yoshis, and Blue Yoshis.Bowser,
however, did not kidnap the other Yoshis because they were too strong and
powerful.Bowser then built a castle for himself and built castles for the
Koopa Kids whom he took with him.Next, Bowser trapped Yoshi in a block
and did the same thing to one Red Yoshi, a Yellow Yoshi, and a Blue
Yoshi.Last, of course, he kidnapped Princess Toadstool and put Toadstool
(Toad for short), messenger and mushroom retainer out of the picture.The
Mario Bros., with a successful attempt, beat Bowser and the Koopa Kids
and rescued Princess Toadstool and the 7 kidnapped Yoshis.Then, after the
game ended, Toad came back to the picture by the aid of the Mario Bros.
and Co.This was most certainly not the end of the Koopa Kids.Morton Koopa
Jr., Roy Koopa, and Ludwig Von Koopa only disappeared temporarily and
Larry Koopa, Wendy O. Koopa, Iggy Koopa, and Lemmy Koopa only fell into
what really is just tomato soup.Remember, the Koopa Kids came back to
challenge Mario and Co. again in Super Mario All-Stars's SMB3.Let's go
back to the Yoshi story.In 1992, Mario, Luigi, Princess Toadstool, Toad,
Yoshi, Koopa Troopa, Donkey Kong, and Bowser signed up to be in the Super
Mario Kart races.The Koopa Kids took off from the action and took a
vacation on their 7 beloved airships they used to use in SMB3, doing
stuff like having a disco party, making powerful weapons and magic wands
for themselves and for Bowser when he came back from the SMK races,
attending bar mitzvahs and bat mitzvahs, playing music (especially
Ludwig), etc.Unfortunately, Yoshi was excluded from being in SMAS (Super
Mario All-Stars), although a king was transformed by one of the Koopa
Kids to look like Yoshi.It's time for another trivial pursuit.Super Mario
World 2:Yoshi's Island is not an indirect sequel.It's a real sequel.We'll
get back to that later.In June or July of 1993, around the time Mario is
Missing was released for the NES and Super NES, Mario was kidnapped by
Bowser.Luigi went to get Mario back with Yoshi by returning real world
artifacts to their rightful spots and rescuing Mario.In about a few days
or a week Bowser stole real artifacts from certain times and kidnapped
Yoshi.On a long mission Mario finally got back the artifacts to their
rightful time spots and rescued Yoshi.There are many more adventures that
Yoshi and the other Yoshis had, including SMW2, where Yoshis took Wario's
son, Baby Mario on a mission to save Wario's other son, Baby Luigi from
the clutches of Baby Bowser, Bowser Sr.'s only own child.I just can't
wait to make new Mario games.I'm very determined.
Thoughts From Jay
Another exceptional bio by M. J. J. Daitch.
Kamkek Toadies By, Tommy
Name: Kamkek Toadies
Race: Toadies
Sex: Male?
Age: Cant tell
Size: Small
Weight: as much as you want
Now sit back and here a tale, a tale of a faithful magician. Ok Im kidding
about the begging anyway Kamkek once wanted some help to help him destory
baby mario and luigi. Well he got the toadies. The Toadies are from
another plantet by the way. Anyway the toadies thought that they were doing
good when listening to Kamkek. So they did anything to kidnap Mario, if
they did though they probably get rid of him for crying. the toadies didnt
relize though that Kamkek was soon going to turn his back on them. Then
when they did they sent him into oblivain, and later would become the soul
heirs of Toadie Land. The not so happiest place in Mario Land. (note to
Jay I forgot to write this to you because ive been on vaction for 3 weeks,
but I was the one who wrote the bio on the Monkeys from Yoshis Island.)
Thoughts From Jay
Yet another overdue viewer bio. I'm getting too old for this.
Subcons By, Erik Winzeler
Vital Stats
Age: Varies
Gender: Males and Females
Height: Shorter than Toad
Weight: Lighter than Mario
Status: Currently thriving in Subconia
Times they pretended to be fairies and scare little children: 20
It all started with a dream. One day, Baby Bowser refused to go to bed. Kamek got sick of it and made a potion to put Bowser to sleep. But little did he know that he mixed his dreaming potion in with the sleeping potion, and any dream that Bowser had would come true. And that night, Bowser dreamed of a world far away called Subconia where little fairy men lived. Bowser got up screaming in terror! He went and told Kamek, who didn't believe him and sent him to bed. But Bowser wouldn't go to bed in fear that the little fairy men would come again. But it was already too late. Right as Bowser woke up, the dream came true, and the little fairy men came to life. They were grateful to Bowser. And the next night, they came to him in a dream and told him how to get rid of Kamek. So as soon as Bowser woke up, he went over to Kamek and shouted "NOW". Suddenly a door popped out of nowhere and three dozen Sub-cons flew out. Kamek ran screaming "Aaahh, the fairy men are alive!" The Sub-cons chased Kamek into the door and flew in after him. Kamek fought back, turning the Sub-cons into horrible creatures like Shy-guys and Snifits. But the Sub-cons overpowered him, and used the Dream Machine to transform Kamek into the most hideous creature ever - Wart, who couldn't do anything. The Sub-cons sent Wart, with the Shy-guys, Snifits, and all the other deformed Sub-cons far away. But Kamek-Wart was far from finished. He united the deformed Sub-cons and all the bad dreams in Subconia and attacked the King of the Sub-cons, stealing the Dream Machine. He used it to make more of his deformed creatures, including Beezos, Ninjis, and Trouters. The Sub-cons went into hiding. Then, they entered the dream of a pasta-eating plumber, knowing that this was their last hope. They begged him to come save their world from the evil Wart-creature. Mario then found a warp door to Subconia with Luigi, Toad, and Peach. They battled Warts minions all the way to Sub-con castle, which was run by Wart. Mario and Luigi recognized something about Wart from their childhood, but they couldn't figure it out. So Mario and co. battled the veggie-hating Wart until he couldn't take it anymore. He surrendered, and Mario and co. went home as Subconian heroes, as far as Mario's dream went. As for Wart, the Sub-cons punished him by feeding him only vegetables and forcing him to watch the Looney Tunes Frog in concert over and over and over and over...
This is Erik Winzeler signing off.
Thoughts From Jay
Interesting idea, a Kamek/Wart crossover.